Six years ago, actor-producer Andie Chen tied the knot with Taiwanese actress Kate Pang, and as they say, the rest is history. They now have two young ones, Aden and Avery, and going by their Instagram feed and YouTube channels, they have their hands extremely full every day.
Acknowledging that the past six years have passed in a blur, loving husband Andie is unabashed in declaring how amazing the past six years have been, in the larger scheme of things.
“Being in a marriage is very comforting. Life can be quite overwhelming but being married to Kate has made me feel like I can do this for a long, long time. She is my partner who supports me and fights my battles with me.”
It’s Never About Winning
While the couple makes their family life look so gloriously fun from their Instagram feeds, the reality, Andie shares, is never as straightforward.
“Sometimes, Kate behaves in ways that I do not immediately understand. However, when I take a step back to think rationally, I realise that a lot of it stems from our different family backgrounds.”
With this understanding, Andie never feels the need to win or have the last say in arguments. He explains, “I am always striving to talk things out and willing to apologise first, even if it makes it seem that I have “lost”. But for me, this is about acknowledging how much Kate has sacrificed and given to the relationship.”
As he wisely puts it, “When issues arise in a relationship, something has to give. If it is not you, then it has to be her. And if it is neither of you, then it will be the relationship that gives way.”
15 Minutes a Day
Singaporeans are a busy, time-pressed lot, and many couples find themselves consumed by child-rearing or their own individual careers. All too soon, their marriages are at the risk of falling apart when they realise they have drifted too far apart over the years.
Andie is adamant that he and Kate make time for each other without their children at least once a week. While dinner dates and staycations are great, Andie shares that more often than not, they reconnect in 15-minute pockets of time spent in the car, driving each other to work.
“These small pockets of time really make a big difference to us, as we can catch up on each other’s lives, exchange ideas and share our latest reads and activities. It’s really important to me to not lose touch with Kate even as we are kept so busy with our lives.”
Not Just the Here and Now
The children eventually do grow up, and Andie knows that all too well.
“For now, when the kids are with us, we are very much focused on them, nurturing them and just trying our best to raise them right. Life’s pretty good right now, and I’m very grateful for everything. So, in five years’ time, I hope to be doing more or less the same as we are doing now but maybe Kate will be able to stay home full time by then?” Andie says with a hopeful chuckle.
Tags: Growing your relationship /Communication /Commitment